I’ll never stop believing survivors

Every time I speak out about sexual harassment, sexual assault, and rape, someone screams “false accusations” or “innocent until proven guilty” or “women assault men too” or all three at me. Every. Single. Time.

Let me be very clear, I believe survivors. I will never stop believing survivors. Will I be wrong to believe someone at some point? Probably, but it’s highly unlikely, so I will always err on the side of believing someone who says they have been harassed or assaulted. Always. Continue reading “I’ll never stop believing survivors”

Fed up

I am so beyond fed up that I can’t even adequately express myself, it seems, but here goes (because when I’m fed up or riled up, I blog).

For any of you who feel you need some history on my own experiences, here is a blog entry a wrote a few years ago about having been sexually assaulted. I have been sexually harassed on an extremely regular basis since I was 11 years old. I have been touched by men when I haven’t wanted to be touched. I have been repeatedly bothered by men who couldn’t take ‘no’ for an answer. I have been – for all intents and purposes – stalked by two men I dated for a short time each; one for the better part of a year, the other for more than two years. Continue reading “Fed up”

#MeToo has not gone too far

In fact, it has yet to go far enough.

In the wake of Ontario’s provincial Conservative leader being accused of sexual harassment and assault, I’ve been receiving messages from people that maybe #MeToo has gone too far; maybe it’s backfiring; men don’t know what they can do anymore; men think all women are man-haters. Continue reading “#MeToo has not gone too far”

My feminism and my love of boxing meet

To follow up those last three posts about boxing, indulge me for a few minutes whilst I tell you about a project that I’m working on.

Seven years ago, I tried boxing on a dare. I walked into FightFit in St. Catharines and it wasn’t long before the sport that I’d previously considered barbaric and requiring little skill became the sport I loved precisely because of how much skill is required. Continue reading “My feminism and my love of boxing meet”

Why some people box

I posted this just about a year ago on another blog as I was training for my second fight. I did not write this post. Rather, it is a copy and paste of an article that is also linked to in the first paragraph.

(Please support: Boxing made accessible to everyone.)

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If you’re still trying to wrap your head around why some people box, this is a great read: How Boxing Got Me to Face My Fears

Continue reading “Why some people box”

How boxing and violence against women are different

Just shy of a year ago, I was training for my second fight and promoting it on social media. Someone challenged me and told me that I was encouraging violence against women. Here’s what I wrote at that time.

(Please support: Boxing made accessible to everyone.)

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It’s nice to be on vacation. It means I can go to Energy whenever I wake up in the morning and not at obscene o’clock. So, yes, I started yesterday off with an hour on the bike and “travelled” the equivalent of 15.07 km. Seems that’s all I can muster on the bike whilst reading a book. I did increase the intensity, though, so the calorie burn was higher. Continue reading “How boxing and violence against women are different”

Piece of meat

I originally wrote this a little more than four years ago and published it on another blog. The response was overwhelming. I am re-publishing it here today, with some edits, to accompany Monday’s Practical Feminist podcast episode about rape culture and to reassure whomever is reading this and relating to it that they are not alone.

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The first thing you have to know about this post is that it will be very difficult for some of you to read. Please tread carefully. Read the tags I’ve put on it and then tread carefully.

There’s been a lot going on in the world of social media and in my life that’s compelled me to write this. It’s deeply personal and, before I even start writing it, I know it’s going to be deeply painful. Continue reading “Piece of meat”

The silence of our friends

Last week, nearly 100 men in Niagara attended the Coalition to End Violence Against Women’s (CEVAW) 101 Men event, featuring Jackson Katz and his Mentors in Violence Prevent (MVP) training. Since that day, I have read a few tweets, a Facebook post or two, and a newspaper column about how interesting and important the conference was; about men needing to act; about men needing to treat violence against women as a men’s issue to join in the fight to stop it.

So far, and – to be fair, it’s just five days later – I have neither heard nor read anything about what specific action will be taken; what specific action men who attended the day’s workshops will engage in. Continue reading “The silence of our friends”